esson 53: Merlin
- he
hawk flies away and I hear deep laughter. I turn to the left and
see Merlin, sitting behind a stone table, smiling and beckoning.
He speaks: "It is said that when the student is ready, the teacher
appears. But in your case it's 'When the student is ready, the
student appears.'!"
- "Well, here I am," I reply, chuckling.
- "Come over here," he says. "Are you ready to bloom into the
flying, singing one the hawk spoke of?"
- "Oh, absolutely."
- "Truth lies at the heart of the stone. Have a look; tell me
what you see."
erlin's irror
- 1. What is the face I show to the world?--Spear Knight [fire
of fire]
- This card has come recently to represent my desire to ACT.
Some have told me that it would be rash and/or foolish to do so.
I'm afraid one person sees me as being 'pushy.' Others have
advised me to act, and expect me to do so.
- In another aspect, I am coming back to life--recapturing my
energy--with the approach of spring.
- Active and adventurous, but risky and hasty.
- 2. What hidden fears lead me to assume this mask?--Talesin
- Although a story can seldom be worse than reality, it can
always be better. I want to make the story, not be made into the
story.
- Also, fear of a mundane or traditional lifestyle, or fearing
to appear as such.
- 3. What do I expect to gain from presenting this mask?--Grail
Nine
- The Arthurian Tarot book says: "Satisfaction, one's heart's
desire; security; physical pleasure; emotional contentment." Good
motivations for anything, I'd say.
- Actually, in my current situation, I can get frustrations out
this way--by saying I'm going to do this and that. It brings
satisfaction. In other situations, my 'planned impetuousness'
definitely brought me some of that other stuff. = )
- 4. What am I doing with my life?--Spear Eight
- Progressing, growing, communicating, moving along, going with
the flow.
- 5. Who would I like to be?--Grail Queen
- This is the woman who loves her neighbor.
- 6. What is preventing me from becoming this?--Grail Ten
- This doesn't make a lot of sense. Perhaps my desire for a
peaceful, happy home, which I don't have. This card has a solitary
feel--maybe that's a clue.
- 7. What opportunities am I avoiding?--The Cauldron
- Learning moderation of emotions, and how to handle the bad as
well as the good. I'd rather avoid the bad then learn to deal
directly with it. Also, relationships and companionship with women
(off-line).
- 8. How do I envision my life becoming?--Lady of the Lake
- I strive toward enlightenment and the ability to draw on a
well-developed intuition. I envision a life of ever-increasing
knowledge of spiritual law, and wisdom to be ruled by same.
- 9. Who is the real me?--Spear Five
- The Arthurian Tarot book says: "the need to distinguish
between rightful intuition and unassuaged desires." Yes, I
struggle constantly between what's 'right' and what I
want--between conscience and conscious--and how to know the
difference.
- Also, I tend to go in different directions at the same time.
- 10. What is my life purpose?--Stone Nine
- I have a hard time with this card, and I was pondering it, and
thinking about the recent meditation when I took my sculpture out
there to 'show' the animals. I suddenly had this telescopic
view--the stone carving, the woods, the card, the table, my house
. . . and out from there.
- Someone once said that I must have been very good at Show and
Tell as a child. I think my life purpose is to show and tell.
What? That if a human can create a stone carving to set in the
woods, whowhat created the woods, the animals, &c. Gifts and
blessings. Simple bliss.
- [Putting on best televangelist voice:] "I have a MESSAGE for
youuuuuu today, and it's a MESsage of SIM-PLE BLISSSSSS. Say
Hallelujah!"
- 11. What do I still need to assimilate to find the real
me?--Stone Queen
- Practicality! 'nuff said.
- 12. What masks do I need to drop?--Sword Nine
- Hah! That's no mask, but I definitely need to drop my
worrying, depression, despair . . . and quit sharing these
concerns with others. Drop the long face!
- 13. What is the next stop in my life's journey?--Grail Five
- This card seems ambiguous . . . mysterious. Only the journey
is indicated, not the destination. Looking forward, rather than
behind.
-
Merlin gifts me with a fragment of the mirror. I see the Stone
Queen and am reminded of what I need to assimilate--practicality.
Notes:
- center horiz. row: fire of fire--cauldron--crossed
spears--cauldron--water of water
- the only two cards with cauldrons came up
- the two 'feminine' indoor Queens came up
- cards 4 & 12 next to each other are symmetrical, with
spear/sword floating down a curving stream
- 3 Nines